Coping with Loss and Grief
Written by Kim Johnson, Author of “I Am My Sister (Women helping Women) LLC @ immysister.org
It took me a long time to write about this subject because I wasn’t really sure how I would approach the topic. But when my friends’ mother passed, I knew I had to talk about it. Especially since I never really could cope with loss or death too well myself, and…so many of my friends are going through the same thing right now.
Losing the majority of my relatives and the loss of my husband in divorced really took a toll on me at one time. I don’t know if it had anything to do with the fact that I didn’t know the Lord as well as I do now, or I was depressed or that I simply grieve hard and long. In any event, I eventually had to seek help from professionals so that I could move on with my life and get back on track.
When I talk about loss and grief, I am talking about, “Death of a loved one, Divorce or relationship breakup, Loss of health, Losing a job, Loss of financial stability, a miscarriage, Retirement, Death of a pet, Loss of a cherished dream, A loved one’s serious illness, Loss of a friendship, Loss of safety after a trauma and Selling the family home” (Smith, Robinson, & Seagel, 2018).
Today, the death of a loved one, the loss of a relationship or any other form of loss is equally as hard for me, but the difference is, I now have the tools to cope with my grief. I understand that even though I am a Christian, I am not exempt from suffering and that I can do all thing through Christ who strengthens me. I understand that in my darkest hours I MUST lean on God heavily, and that Satan’s desire is to destroy me at all cost, even in my weakness.
“I also understand that I cannot let anyone tell me how to feel nor should you either. Your grief is your own, and no one else can tell you when it’s time to “move on” or “get over it.” Let yourself feel whatever you feel without embarrassment or judgment. It’s okay to be angry, to yell at the heavens, to cry or not to cry. It’s also okay to laugh, to find moments of joy, and to let go when you’re ready” (Smith et al., 2018).
But if you feel you cannot cope with loss or grief recognize it and reach out to a grief counselor or professional therapist or someone you trust.
Sister to Sister do you hear me? Are you suffering alone? Reach out!
Smith, M. M. (2018, July). Coping with Grief and Loss: Dealing with the Grieving Process and Learning to Heal. Retrieved from https://www.helpguide.org/articles/grief/coping-with-grief-and-loss.htm